EP.18 - Creativity, Grit, and Inspiration with Stephanie Owens
SHOW NOTES:
Navigating the intersection between creativity and entrepreneurship can be a tricky proposition.
Too often, creatives feel pressured to conform to societal norms in order to attract clients and build a successful business, which can lead to losing touch with their unique identity and vision.
How can you maintain your authentic creativity while building a thriving business?
Stephanie Owens – a lettering artist, brand strategist, entrepreneur, and coach – says that the key is to master the art of balancing creativity, grit, and inspiration in her work.
She shares her insights and experiences on how to harness the power of creativity and authenticity to fuel your entrepreneurial journey, and how to stay motivated through the inevitable challenges and setbacks.
Join me and Stephanie as we explore the keys to unlocking your creativity and bringing your unique vision to life.
Here are the key takeaways from this episode:
03:54 - Society is so full of conformity and algorithms that many people have lost their creative voice
07:59 - Embrace the learning process and not just go for monetizing it right away
15:33 - Life is about seasons
24:26 - What separates a hobby artist from someone who is building a business?
27:03 - Don't lose your own identity or values to fit in
39:06 - If you ever have to cover up who you are, it's a sign that it's not going to be sustainable
41:55 - The life experience is where the gold is at the end of the day
46:57 - It's your job to do what you love and the right people will find you
ABOUT OUR GUEST
Stephanie Owens is the co-founder and studio letterer at Gold Sheep Designs, where she and her husband specialise in digital illustrations and custom letterforms that tell stories and grow fandoms.
She also writes curriculum for the best-selling novelist of all time, Agatha Christie, and is the Education Director at The Futur.
She's just a simple sci-fi loving, hard-rock blasting, child of the 80s who never grew up and now uses her work to advocate for those who have lost their creative voice in a culture of conformity and algorithms.
Learn more about Stephanie through their website goldsheepdesign.com and Instagram page @goldsheepdesign.
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About Me:
I help you lead with fearless authenticity by smashing the self-imposed heteronormative stereotypes that keep you playing small through emotional healing inner child and inherited intergenerational trauma. Create a purposeful life of your unique design by disrupting societal norms and expectations of who you should be. Explore mindfulness, fearless curiosity and loving kindness through the lens of Human Design to thrive as the person you are born to be.
Learn more about my coaching method and join my emotional healing, mindfulness, and music community at melissaindot.com.
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TRANSCRIPT
[00:00:00]
Stephanie: Our society is so full of conformity and algorithms that so many people have lost their creative voice. They've lost their identity, and I know that that happened with me as well. So by me doing this type of work that feeds my soul, that I also get paid for, is really what I want to inspire in other creatives.
[00:00:25]
Melissa: Hey, there. Welcome to the Fearlessly Curious Podcast, your safe space. Listen, lean in and learn the diversity of human experiences through the lens of fearless curiosity. When we learn more about each other, we also learn more about ourselves. How? Because when we listen to each other's curiosities and experiences, we relate to that which is in common, and that which sets us apart, gives us something to reflect on. We learn through and with each other. I'm grateful to you, the global community, for your curious questions. The Fearlessly Curious Podcast cannot exist without you.
[00:01:13]
Melissa: Welcome to the Fearlessly Curious Podcast, and it seems that I, I'm always very excited when I get to record these sessions for all of you, but today, I’m even more excited because I have Stephanie Owen with us today, and I met Stephanie in an incredible entrepreneur network. But the truth is I was very much magnetised to you, Stephanie, because of what I recognize as being an incredibly powerful unique energy that you bring to any space.
[00:01:44]
Melissa: And immediately I knew, I'm like, I need to somehow become friends cause I would really love her in my friend network. And uh, when I invited you to be on the podcast and you said yes, I have to admit I think I did a little bit of a minion boogie. And then to have you here today with me is super exciting cause at least from my perspective, I know that you have an incredible story, a personal story and journey, at least for me.
[00:02:13]
Melissa: And I would love to know more about it, but more than anything, have you share that with our listeners because what I'm passionate about is reminding people that to show up exactly as who we are in the world, in life, is one of the most important things we can do. And it isn't always easy, but often when we hear each other's stories, it gives us the courage, the inspiration, and the motivation to just take baby steps in that self-discovery process, to show up with fearless authenticity.
[00:02:43]
Melissa: That was just like a huge speech I didn't prepare. But this is not about me today. This is all about you. So I'm just gonna ask you if you could introduce yourself to everybody, even though I just did that, and maybe share what's on your heart right now. What are you most passionate about in life right now, at this moment, Stephanie?
[00:02:59]
Stephanie: Yeah. Well, thank you for having me. It's really nice to hear such kind words about myself. I don't always have that viewpoint or know how other people see me, so it's nice to hear. So I'm Stephanie Owens. I run an illustration and hand lettering studio with my husband. We're in Las Vegas and I'm the hand letterer, he's the illustrator and we primarily specialise in identity design and illustrations for entertainment brands like rock music, pop culture, things like that. And what I'm most passionate right now about is I'm in the middle of making a collection of lettered lyrics where I'm lettering different lyrics from different songs that I love, and it's really helped me like step out of my boundaries as a lettering artist and get back to my roots of what I really love doing as a creative.
[00:03:50]
Stephanie: I love to use my work to empower other creatives. Our society is so full of conformity and algorithms that so many people have lost their creative voice. They've lost their identity, and I know that that happened with me as well. So by me doing this type of work that feeds my soul, that I also get paid for is really what I want to inspire in other creatives, and I'm also working on an accelerator program with a business buddy of mine to help. His name is Ben Burns and he and I will be helping beginning creatives build businesses around what they love that are profitable. So sort of two things. It's like I got my foot in helping other business owners, helping other creatives just launch that business and make it happen.
[00:04:39]
Stephanie: But then also doing the same for me and growing my own practice and thinking beyond just working with clients. And you know, I'm now in that kind of phase of like, I'm kind of done with clients. They're great. Sometimes. But I also am thinking to myself, how else, where else can I take my craft? I'm huge into mastering my craft, learning different lettering styles, and the history behind it.
[00:05:02]
Stephanie: I have a mentor that I meet with about once a month. He gives me feedback. We talk about lettering. It's great. And that's not something that I always had in my life. I think that part of my journey is discovering what I really loved doing. I've had many different career paths and none of them felt right.
[00:05:20]
Stephanie: And now that I'm in my f–– I think when you get in your forties, you're just like, I just don't care anymore. Okay. I don't care what other people think. Like why was I so concerned about that in my twenties and thirties about what people thought? I'm just gonna go for it and I'm gonna do what I love to do, and I've figured out what I love to do, and now I'm sort of in another fork in the road in my life where it's like, oh, yep, I'm gonna go this way and I'm gonna letter and see where it takes me and focus on doing what I love.
[00:05:46]
Melissa: Oh my goodness, so much there. Thank you. Thank you for kind of bringing us into your world. You've covered so many aspects of your life right now, so of course I have more curiosities. I'd like to dive into, first of all, that accelerator program that you mentioned with your business buddy.
[00:06:02]
Melissa: Is this something that's a one-off, or are you experimenting with it, or do you already have a plan for it to be something that runs as a rolling program. I'm just curious for anybody listening, cause you are talking about helping creatives do what they love. I mean that's even lighting me up right now. How would people sort of get in touch with you to inquire more about that?
[00:06:23]
Stephanie: Yeah, but it is gonna be launched to the public through The Futur, the future without an ‘e’. And it's the accelerator program and it's a membership. It's a year long membership, and it's like a week by week. Ben and I are gonna be like, do this, and then do this, and then do this. And we're gonna be looking at people's work too, because I think that's, I think that's something that's missing in online education, especially around building a business around a craft is, especially for people who have, you know, like me, I'm a self-taught lettering artist, but I sought out a mentor and he gives me feedback.
[00:06:58]
Stephanie: Mm-hmm. And when you're self-taught and you didn't go to school, you don't know if you're good or not. And so Ben and I are gonna have those uncomfortable conversations with people if needed, because it's so much better to know at the beginning of your creative journey when you're building a business around something, not just your creative journey, but maybe farther down the road when you're like, I think I wanna start making this hobby of mine profitable.
[00:07:23]
Stephanie: Whether it be photography or design or interiors or video, whatever it is. Is it gonna be profitable? Am I good enough for people to pay me to do this? With the amount of money that I need to not only survive, but to thrive? And so Ben and I are gonna be looking at people's work too, at the very beginning of the program.
[00:07:43]
Stephanie: And we're gonna get on the phone with people if needed and be like, if they're a lettering artist, I'm gonna say, here's some resources, you're gonna need to make a decision of whether you're gonna focus on your craft right now, or you're gonna double up and work on your craft while you're building your business.
[00:07:58]
Stephanie: Because I think we need to embrace the learning process and not just go for monetizing it right away. So I was able to take some time with lettering. I discovered it late in life, but with other income, I was able to take that income, fuel my passion for lettering, take courses, hire a mentor, and go at it as much as possible in, you know, the fringe moments of life when I'm like, I've got five minutes, I can do a sketch or something like that.
[00:08:30]
Stephanie: But just fully immersing myself into that one skill too. I think that's something that, you know, we love doing a lot of things like I am the poster child for this. I have a photography degree, I have an interior design degree. I have been a copywriter before I taught high school English, and I don't even have an English degree.
[00:08:48]
Stephanie: I just passed a bunch of exams to prove that I could teach the class. And then I am a self-taught lettering artist who has taken the time to work with a mentor. So I get it. I get like, we wanna do a lot of things. Oh, and I play the guitar, not that I would ever monetize thatBut I think that's, that's something that we wanna monetize everything.
[00:09:06]
Stephanie: We wanna be like, well, I can do this and I can do this and I can do this. And sometimes it's just for me at least, so satisfying to dig deep into a craft when I know it's the craft that I want, and I think that exploration is so important for me to have done photography, for me to have done interior design and teaching English.
[00:09:29]
Stephanie: And nothing ever felt right until I discovered lettering and guitar has always just been a hobby. It's something fun that I like to do, and it is one of those things that I like to do. For me, and people will be like, what are you gonna get on Instagram and play us some Metallica? And I'm like, well, I kind of like doing that just for myself.
[00:09:47]
Stephanie: I actually am not that great, but it's fun and I just don't want to always feel like everything I do has to be Instagram ready. You know, I think that's getting back to like the algorithm and the performance. And I'm an introvert and I don't want my entire life to be broadcasted every little moment of my life. And you know, I also think it adds a little mystique to my character. Like, oh, she's that chick with all the guitars. When are we gonna hear you? But I don't know, maybe someday you'll hear me play guitar. Follow along. You'll see maybe someday.
[00:10:18]
Melissa: And for the record. For the record, for those of you who are on the audio only and not on the video podcast, I am looking, of course, the beautiful Stephanie, but in the background, I can't help but be distracted by six guitars and I believe four basses. I know that you said they're not yours. Yeah, but six guitars,
[00:10:36]
Stephanie: Those are all mine. All the guitars are.
[00:10:39]
Melissa: Just six out of many more. Apparently what I'm hearing, Stephanie, is that you're a multihyphenate. And meaning that you are passionate about many things and you give yourself permission to be passionate about many things and to explore many things, and that definitely resonates with me as well.
[00:10:55]
Melissa: We're human beings. Last time I checked I was human and we are actually all creative. Because ultimately we're creation itself, right? I mean, literally two people came together and made us. Uh, how incredible is that? And so just by being ourselves and allowing ourselves to be in flow in life, we are creating, and this is something that I feel passionate about, our traditional education system, right, is teaching us numeracy, literacy, geography, history, blah, blah, blah, all the rest of it.
[00:11:22]
Melissa: But really what that's doing is it's putting us in little boxes and in as much as labels and words are required to give us a sense of belonging and then help us identify who we are. Without awareness, those labels become limits. And this is something I say over and over and over again, and I feel like there is no system out there that really supports us to be in full discovery mode so that we learn how to read, we learn how to write.
[00:11:48]
Melissa: But we're also given, we're also held to give ourselves permission to be what is unknown, to be in that discovery mode beyond literacy and beyond numeracy. What it sounds to me is this accelerator program you're creating for creatives is like a school almost for creatives, where you're guiding them to be in flow, to be free, but to be held within a structure. Am I understanding that correctly?
[00:12:10]
Stephanie: Yeah, we're not telling them what they have to do in their business. We are recommending that they choose the season that they're in. And I think that that makes a lot of sense because if I look back on my life, I've had seasons of photography and I had seasons of, you know, deep into literature and teaching and deep into, you know, rest.
[00:12:36]
Stephanie: And not taking on clients and deep into interior design, and then things change. But the focus, I think, is what has always helped me. It's when I was doing photography, I was deep in photography, and then things happened. My camera got stolen. I was very young. I, you know, the situation I was in as a child I needed to get out of.
[00:12:59]
Stephanie: So I was like, I need to make money now. And I'm too naive and young. I wanted to be a Rolling Stones photographer, but for the magazine not for the band, but the band would've been great too. But it's just I was in different seasons of my life and I have found that focusing on the one thing that I wanna be known for in that season has helped.
[00:13:18]
Stephanie: And that's what we're gonna encourage people to do in the accelerator, especially in the beginning of your creative career. Not your creative life, but making a career out of your creativity. If we just focus a little bit and then we can keep adding. So right now, my design studio has several things that we can do, but combined, my husband and I have been doing different creative skills for decades and there's two of us, which means it's even compounded on top of that.
[00:13:48]
Stephanie: So we are gonna recommend people give it your all. Give one thing your all for six months, you can do that. Six months, and then from there, you know, you might not like what you're doing. Six months later you may fall deeply in love with it and feel like right now I never want to think about doing anything else.
[00:14:08]
Stephanie: Or maybe you love what you're doing, but you don't love who you're doing it for. And I've been there. I've loved the craft of lettering and identity design. But I had clients that just drove me nuts. So it was like, okay, how can we now shift our focus away from these kinds of clients to get the people we really love to work with?
[00:14:31]
Stephanie: So it's the creative career and the creative life is – it's not linear. and sometimes it gets messy, but embrace the messy and you can still do other things in life, but to try to make a career. I mean, we all hear through a 100K and the five figure client and we’re kind of overhearing that. Even though the accelerator program is designed to help you get to a 100K for me, are you making that living? It's not just about that. No, not at all. Like I've done that and I was miserable because of the clients we were serving, and I was just like, why am I even doing this? Like I had a full-time teaching job. My husband had a full-time art director job, and we made almost six figures in six months and with just the business on top of our jobs.
[00:15:19]
Stephanie: And then we were just like, what is this? We don't even like these people that we're working with and we don't need this money. So, it's for us, it's just always been more about what do we love to do and can we make a living from that? Yeah. And let's try to do that.
[00:15:33] Melissa: I love that you mentioned about the seasons, because life is about seasons, right? We look at nature. Everything has its own season and cycle. You teach and hold, uh, mentoring, coaching, holding people in their different seasons for them to become aware of what their own seasons are. So because this world is all about hustle culture, it's about pushing through and like you said, we all see the 100K, the 10K months, and I had a 100K month in November, 2022.
[00:16:01]
Melissa: And that was like, blew my mindset, first of all, my business mindset. But the truth is I was completely burnt out after that, you know, and I hyperfocus and, and again, same thing. What I understand is the experience is what we wanna lean into for wisdom, not beat ourselves down from it. Now, for me, it's like I know I can reach that goal, but I also know that I burnt out from it.
[00:16:22]
Melissa: So how can I approach it now with more awareness for my mental health and my emotional wellbeing? And I love that what you are championing, at least what I'm hearing you are championing, is honouring our cycle of life, honouring why we're here. In discovery mode. Like what is my creative life? How can I be creative in my business, how can I make that successful?
[00:16:45]
Melissa: But also at the same time, allow myself the experience of life and harvest the wisdom through those experiences in the different seasons. Not abandon myself, like go for that 100K, but work with the clients that actually in my heart are soul destroying, right? And find that balance by simply doing it, living it compassionately.
[00:17:05]
Melissa: But having a wonderful mentor and a community around it. It sounds incredible and I just wanna say thank you. Thank you for creating this for creatives like you. An earlier version of you, creatives like me and all the other creatives who are listening right now. I wanna come pull back to you now cause you talk about lettering.
[00:17:24]
Melissa: And when I think of lettering, I think of – because this is like maybe jargon or language, I think of fonts. Do I understand it correctly? Is it, in essence, you design fonts or is it a different thing?
[00:17:36]
Stephanie: No, it's a misconception. There's fonts, typography, and that's setting type that's already designed, and then there's calligraphy where you have a tool and you are using handwriting of some kind and it's fluid and it's not edited.
[00:17:50]
Stephanie: It's just, you write it and it's there. Okay. Um, lettering is somewhere in between. I draw, it's like illustrated letters. Okay. So it is a little known skill and it kind of went away with desktop publishing in the nineties and all the fonts. Fonts sort of killed the lettering. But you know, before that in advertising, all of the text treatments were hand drawn.
[00:18:20]
Stephanie: So everything I do is hand drawn. I don't start with a font and I draw the letters and then I add textures or, and it's quite technical because as an illustrator, I think you can get away with creative licence and be a bit more artistic. And when you're drawing letters, you're drawing a message.
[00:18:41]
Stephanie: You're drawing words. And that's probably one of the things that I love about lettering so much, and I can see it in my past, is when I was a kid and because of how I lived, I was lost in music and song lyrics just always grabbed me. And little snippets of books, quotes. I just love that kind of stuff. And I remember seeing when I was in college the first time, for photography my mentor's lettering. And I had no idea that it was hand done. I thought it was a font and I, I just had no idea. And then I became an English teacher because of my love of language and words. And I loved dissecting word choice with my students. The Great Gatsby is the most beautiful book ever written, and I could go on about that all day.
[00:19:30]
Stephanie: And then it just sort of, it got to the point where when I discovered that what lettering was and what my mentor was doing was not, he wasn't type setting, and it was actually drawn from scratch, from a thought in his head. He took a message and he translated it into art, but it has to be legible. It has to communicate the message well.
[00:19:54]
Stephanie: So it does have a little bit more technicalities than illustrating, but you're basically illustrating words, and so for me it sort of, like it took my love of music and the lyrics as a kid, my love of teaching literature as an adult, and always being so fascinated by my mentor's work. And then he just happened to start teaching it during the pandemic online and I was just like, oh, that's the guy that I've been, you know, obsessed with his work since I was 19 years old, and here I am at age 40, learning how to letter from him and even figuring out that, no, that's not a font, that's handcrafted and hand done. And I digitised mine, but back in the fifties and in the sixties, you know, there was no Adobe Illustrator that was all hand done, and it's such a fascinating craft.
[00:20:50]
Melissa: Wow. Thank you so much for sharing, for teaching the difference, the definition between, you know, a font, typography and lettering. I just learned something totally new. Now it's really sparked my curiosity because I too have a passion for music. I, you know, I'm a, well, you may not know, but I'm a musician and singer songwriter as well.
[00:21:09]
Melissa: And lyrics are a big thing. I love languages. I love storytelling, and this whole idea now, this concept of lettering and storytelling through designing the letters has just blown my mind. Cause that just puts a whole other layer into storytelling. I never, ever saw it that way. I never even knew this existed.
[00:21:31]
Stephanie: Yeah. How easy is it to find a font that kind of matches a song? And writing it down and being like, that's cool. It's a totally different thing. I've finished two pieces this week, and when I am picking songs and when I am doing the lettering piece for the song, I am immersing myself in that song. I'm thinking, what colour is that song?
[00:21:51]
Stephanie: What would the lettering of the name of this song look like without even thinking about a font. And so the one that I, I just finished today a couple hours ago, was for Metallica’s The Unforgiven. And it has this very Western quality. It's very rooted in the spaghetti Western sound. So I was like, I kind of want it to look Western, but I want it to still look sort of glam, like my style is very glam.
[00:22:17]
Stephanie: So I start by looking at fonts and I'm like, well, what if I take that part of that font and that part of that font and draw it in a way that sort of mashes up those two, but then do like this, like gold gilded, look over it, make it look all old and western like it's on a storefront in an old saloon town or something like that. And it's very fun and very satisfying.
[00:22:41]
Melissa: Oh gosh. Sounds incredible. Are you publishing this anywhere? Did I hear you correctly? This is something you're doing for yourself, is that right?
[00:22:48]
Stephanie: Yeah this is a personal project. Some of them I will be able to sell because the title is super vague. It's not really something that's obvious, but I will have these up on Instagram.
[00:23:02]
Stephanie: I would rather create the work and be proud of it and not feel like I have to share it on Instagram right away. I do share Instagram stories just like my progress. But I don't post on Instagram that much and this is me, like I know I should. But I don't want to be a slave to it, and I will at some point.
[00:23:24]
Stephanie: I feel like if I'm going to post on Instagram, I need to give the monster what it needs or it's not worth it, it's not worth my time. So I know right now Instagram is pushing reels. I know right now they're pushing short form reels. I know that artists do well if you are showing your process. So I'm like, okay, well I need to figure out how to do all of that.
[00:23:48]
Stephanie: So if I'm gonna post on Instagram, I might as well make it worth my while. But one of the issues I also have is Instagram wants you to use trending audio. But all of my songs, all of my pieces are based on songs and I'm like, well, screw Instagram on that one because I'm not gonna do some Taylor Swift songs.
[00:24:06]
Stephanie: I apologise to any of the Taylor Swift fans out there. But I mean, I've already said I listened to Metallica, so I don't listen to Taylor Swift, I don't know anything about her. But I'm not going to post, I'm not going to budge on that one. I'll do the video. That's fine. Cause the purpose of posting on Instagram is to get brand awareness is to build our business.
[00:24:26]
Stephanie: Let's not be naive about this. I mean, I think that's what separates the hobby artist. Oh, that sounded weird. the hobby artist from the person who is building a business. Like if I was a hobby artist, I would just post whatever whenever and I would not give it any kind of strategy at all.
[00:24:45]
Stephanie: And there's nothing wrong with that at all. Yeah. But if the point is I want clients, I want people to buy my work, I want licensees to licence my work to put on a greeting card or something like that. I know I need to build an audience. And I know that Instagram is the way Instagram is, and it wants you to do what it tells you to do.
[00:25:04]
Stephanie: So I might as well step back and just make a bunch of work for myself and then batch it into reels, and then post boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Instagram, I just gave you what you want. It's like a little, it's a little experiment. But I won't budge on the music because it's such a big part of our brand and who we are as people.
[00:25:23]
Stephanie: I'm not going to post something just because it's trendy. I will put an old Metallica song from 30 years ago on my reel, and it'll reach something, someone will like it. It's not gonna be like Instagram probably won't give it a boost because of that. But I'm not, I'm not worried about that. I want to serve who I wanna serve and it's not Taylor Swift fans. And that's okay cause there's plenty of people serving the Taylor Swift fans.
[00:25:49]
Melissa: Absolutely. I love that. Because you know, not conforming and fighting the algorithm, I should say. Or conforming to the algorithm is definitely something that I also struggle with. And I'm sure many people out there who are using the social media platforms to get business right, or to serve their clients, to find the clients that are waiting for them struggle with this. And interestingly enough, a few weeks back, I interviewed somebody who's just created a TikTok short form video agency to help people make reels for Instagram, YouTube shorts and TikTok.
[00:26:23]
Melissa: And I asked about the music piece because I wanna use my original music sometimes on my content. And, I don't. Because I feel like it's not gonna get the reach, right. I want to befriend Instagram and do comply and conform to what they want from me. But actually the feedback I was given is that no, use your original content.
[00:26:45]
Melissa: Go for it. And that felt good to hear that. And it's so aligned with what you are saying right now, which is there's enough people serving the trends. Right. And at the end of the day, what's really highlighted in what I'm just hearing from you today is discernment. I have such high admiration and respect for your level of discernment.
[00:27:03]
Melissa: It's like, don't give in, don't lose your own identity or your own values to fit in. Why fit in? We're not born here to fit in. We're not born into this life to fit in. We are all unique, it seems obvious, but yet it's so easy to get sucked into the system, right, to conform and to comply. Whether it's an algorithm or it's a system or whatever it is.
[00:27:28]
Melissa: Especially for those of us who are more obviously creative. I'd love to know Stephanie, what tips I guess you might give or guidance you might give for those creatives who really are struggling to not fit in. Did I say that right? Yes. Who are struggling with fitting in, but I wanna say it the opposite way.
[00:27:46]
Melissa: They really are, know that they're different, which we all are. And possibly introverts as well. Cause I, I identify as an introvert. Many people find that hard to believe. It's like, how come, how do you identify as an introvert? You are everywhere. And it's like, well, you don't know my struggle every day to show up. Right? Yeah. So what might be something that you could support those introverts out there who are struggling to not fit in?
[00:28:09]
Stephanie: I mean, I have to think back because it's been a while since I've felt that way, and it was like my obvious tip is, turn 40, you'll stop caring. Get old. I think a lot of it is, it's self worth and it's mindset and it's getting rid of thoughts.
[00:28:30]
Stephanie: This is not a quick tip. This is hard work. There is. I will say a quick tip is to order the book The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron. That book changed my life and it really helped me figure out what I wanted to do, who I wanted to be, who I was. I've always considered myself, and I still do, I feel like it's sort of like an AA situation where I will always be a shadow artist, but I am not, you know, it's sort of like you're always an alcoholic, even if you're not drinking.
[00:29:03]
Stephanie: It's like I am always a shadow artist, even though I am creating art right now. I have that, that person is in there. So I would recommend definitely getting anything by Julia Cameron, and starting with The Artist's Way and doing the work in the book. It's a 12 week program and even if you do just the morning pages, which is three pages of journaling every morning, it will help you get out of your head and onto paper.
[00:29:35]
Stephanie: So there's that. But a lot of this is just mindset work. It's taking those thoughts of, I'm unlikeable, I'm unimportant, I'm not trendy, no one will like me. And just starting to slowly shift those because there's cognitive dissonance between I'm not important and people love me. That's such a huge shift.
[00:29:57]
Stephanie: So just moving it from, I'm not important to something like I only think I'm not important. Just starting by just shifting your, whenever you think I'm not important, no one will like me. I only think people won't like me. And then, moving it even more. I'm starting to think that I'm important. I'm starting to think that people don't like me and then just slowly move that scale to, for me it's, I'm capable cause I have struggled creating things and being in the shadow of my dad and my brother who are very insanely talented musicians.
[00:30:32]
Stephanie: My husband, who everyone loves his illustration work, even my work with The Futur being in the shadow of the heads of that business. And so these thoughts of, I'm not important, I am not talented. No one will like what I have to say. Everyone's here for this person, this person, and this person, and I'm just a sidekick.
[00:30:53]
Stephanie: Like I have to do this work too and slowly shift, because for me to be like, I'm not talented to, I am capable of doing any lettering piece. It's a big shift. So whenever I think like that, I can't do this, I just think, I only think I can't do this. And it helps, just that little tiny shift. And then the more I do things I like, I'm starting to think I can do them.
[00:31:16]
Stephanie: And there's certain lettering styles where I'm like, I got this. I know how to, but then there's always a new level, new devil. There's always gonna be some new, you know, situation that comes in where, where I will think, oh, I, I don't know if I can do this. But then I'm like, and then I catch myself up. I only think I can't do this.
[00:31:34]
Stephanie: And then, I think something I tell my students in my workshops who are working on their portfolios and making work that they're passionate about, a big concern is that they think they're so different that no one will like them. And I say, you're special, but you're not that special. We're all special.
[00:31:55]
Stephanie: We're all special. But there are people out there like me who love beautiful clothes, love a good meal, love a luxurious home, but also have seen Metallica five times and can play master puppets on the guitar and love drinking whiskey. Like, it's not like I know that that's like not the typical woman and I've gotten so much like crap about that over the years. Like, oh, you're not feminine enough. And I'm like. Okay. But there are people out there that my personality will resonate with. And, you know what, there are always gonna be people who want to shut you down. And I think that's what, cause the internet is so loud.
[00:32:41]
Stephanie: It is like, I just remember I was in an awful, awful business training with these two women who were – I don't wanna offend anyone from the Midwest – but they were very Midwestern America, like middle of the country, not around diversity, not around a culture other than what they were used to. And they said to me, looking at my portfolio of work, and this is when I was just starting to become who I wanted to be, like stopping and hiding from who I wanted to be. And this was a trigger moment for me. And sometimes I think it's good to just hear this to be like, oh, okay, you're wrong. They said to me, you're just too risky of a designer. I was like, I don't know what you mean. They're like, we are just concerned that people won't hire you, and I did not understand it because our work is solid.
[00:33:41]
Stephanie: It's very professional. It's laid out in a professional way. But what they meant was, I'm not feminine enough. My designs are not female. And I was just like, oh, wait, what? You think everything needs to be beige and everything needs to say live, laugh, love, and it's pretty cursive. Like, what? Is that what you're telling me?
[00:34:02]
Stephanie: And they're like, it's just really risky. And then they showed me some of their work that was a little more, Quote unquote, this is like, this is our edgy work. This is as edgy as you should be as a female designer. And I was like, wow, what? I can't believe I paid you guys to tell me that I need to be more feminine.
[00:34:19] Stephanie: Cause I think I'm a very feminine person. I just have another side to me that is not typically feminine. Yeah. So, I think those types of messages, hearing them just when it kind of blew my mind where I was like, screw this. It actually said this . But I was just like, I can't, I can't deal with this anymore. And it helped me realise that people are stupid. Like there's just some people out in this world. And I was just like, I don't care what these women think.
[00:34:50]
Melissa: Yeah.
[00:34:51]
Stephanie: Why? Why? And it didn't even bother me that they said that. It just blew my mind. And so I think hearing that from them made me realise that this is all just so ridiculous and I might as well just be myself because I'm not doing myself any favours by trying to cater to them. So, and once I did, it was like the clients just came to us. They were like, oh, you guys are that, like the rock and roll design studio. Not that we're famous or anything, but when people find us, they're like, oh man, you guys are like into pop culture and, and rock and roll, and so embracing that because I'm special, but I'm not that special. There are people out there that resonate with what I say and my style, and there's a market for anything. You just have to find those people. You just have to start by being brave and putting out that stuff, putting out the work that you wanna be hired for. And on a business point of view, reaching out to those brands that you think that you are a perfect fit for? No one wants basic things except basic people. Yeah.
[00:35:58]
Melissa: As you said, there's a market for everything.
[00:35:59]
Stephanie: There's plenty of basic people in this world. Yeah, and I think also for me, finding people, and not necessarily like being friends with them, but just finding accounts on social media from people who are really pushing those boundaries in ways that resonate with me and learning from them and being inspired by them and seeing, I can think of one, her name's Sammy Jeff Coates, she's a fashion influencer. But she's very metal and she's very high end as well. And it's just like that perfect combination for me.
[00:36:32]
Stephanie: And she's got like 2 million followers. So just seeing that I'm like that right there proves that there is an audience for the type of person I am.
[00:36:43]
Melissa: Yeah, I love that. I mean, comparison is such a fine line to walk with the practice of comparison, which it's not even a practice, it's something we do naturally, right? Because it's a part of our identity, is to look at something and say, Ooh, who am I compared to that? And I think when we bring awareness to that, it's very important. Without awareness, comparison can kill your creativity. Meaning that you minimise, you change who you are in order to fit. Right? Or with awareness, you can compare and you can go, oh my God, that's not me.
[00:37:14]
Melissa: You know, I don't want to be X, Y, and Z, so I'm not gonna try and fit in. I'm just gonna continue to own who I am as I'm discovering who. And then the other end of that spectrum is, I'm gonna compare, like the example you just gave. I'm gonna compare to this person who's like, wow, proving to me any doubts that I had about standing out being different and not being able to succeed that way has just been blown by this person who is so out there and has millions of followers.
[00:37:39]
Melissa: And now when I compare, I am aspiring. I wanna be my version of this person. So having that awareness is so important. And I think surrounding yourself with people who are like-minded or that you aspire to helps as well. So at any point when I know, like for me, having been a musician for 30 years, I've definitely had my fair share of comparing and abandoning myself and minimising and changing who I am to fit in. My first album was all about fitting in and not offending anybody. I had my tats all airbrushed out for fear of offending people.
[00:38:17]
Stephanie: Oh my God, so I'm actually covering it. I'm not meaning to, but before, so I've got naked ladies behind me. For those of you that are not watching the video, and before I was comfortable with who I am and the way I decorate my house, I would, I'd be like this.
[00:38:36]
Stephanie: I'd like moving around and trying to cover them up very consciously on client calls because I was like. I don't think these vanilla people that I'm working with will find the naked ladies behind me professional. And now I'm just like, oh yeah, naked ladies behind me. Like people will say, oh, is that that the, is that artist shag and that, and there's naked ladies?
[00:39:00]
Stephanie: I'm like, yep, that's him. Then they're like, oh, cool. I like shag. But it's, yeah, like it's the same with your tattoos. It's like if you ever have to cover up who you are, it's not a sign that it's going to be sustainable because there's a part of your soul that is rotting. Hmm. I felt like I had to be a certain way for so long, and then the moment I start to be who I am, someone says, oh, you're, you're too risky.
[00:39:29]
Stephanie: You're kind of scary. And I'm like, Ugh, it's not. Eat bat heads or anything like that. This is an Aussie status medal, but I was just, when just hearing someone say it out loud, the thoughts that I had always had in my head, I was just like, that sounds so silly and I can't believe that that was holding me back for so long.
[00:39:52]
Stephanie: And, but I think, you know, fitting in was very important to me in my twenties and part of my thirties, because I was not a popular child. And I was a very odd child. And once I left home, I just wanted to have friends. I wanted what I had never had. I thought that that was what I needed. I thought that I had to fit in to be friends with whoever I was around, and it has given me a marketable skill. I can perform.I'm very good at performing. So if I am doing a live call and teaching, I turn on teacher Stephanie. If I am drawing, and I'm at home, that's where I'm me. There's different versions of me, but now she's all me.
[00:40:45] Melissa: I was gonna ask, what version do we have here on this podcast?
[00:40:49]
Stephanie: This is performer me because I'm a very quiet person. Okay. Typically, I don't wanna bore you. It's the conversational me. Okay. I'm gonna go and pass out when we're done with exhaustion. But I can do it. But I think it's because I had the introvert energy. I think it's years of practising fitting in where I can fit in. I just now get to pick and choose whether I need to change. Not really. I wouldn't even say at this point it's changing who I am. It's just turning on a different button in my brain.
[00:41:25]
Melissa: And you had to live this in order to get here. And I guess that's what we want the listeners to pick up on or to remember is that really your life experience is what's gonna get you there, right? You said this in the beginning. Some parts of your life. It's the seasons. Some parts are gonna be hard. Sometimes you're gonna have clients or people around you that feel awful. But you gotta remember, we have to remember now with hindsight. Obviously I'm in my late forties, so I'm, I'm like, yeah, hit 40, that makes it easy. It's the life experience where the gold is at the end of the day. And all the people who are rejecting you, right. All people that have rejected you, who made really derogatory comments. So not even constructive criticism, if that's even a real thing. They're also letting, you know, teaching you what you don't want.
[00:42:12]
Melissa: I think there's such a focus on getting clear on what you want, but also knowing what you don't want is really important. Who the people that you are actually not interested in serving – is incredibly important because you are not here, we're not here to self-sacrifice. We're here to own fully who we are. You know, there's only one Stephanie Owens in the world.
[00:42:32]
Melissa: If you don't show the world you, and even the different versions of you, if you don't do it, who will? And that wisdom of your specific life experience as Stephanie Owen will be lost. Humanity will be at a loss. And when I say this to myself, I think, oh my God, that's such a big statement to make. Who do you think you are?
[00:42:50]
Melissa: Well, I'm Melissa Indot. And I'm talking to the one and only Stephanie Owens. And that is a basic, and yet, profoundly powerful fact. And I would love everybody listening. You know, Stephanie has shared so much today and through her teaching quality, through her entertainment quality, through her life experience qualities –there is so much here that is rich fodder for your personal growth, but also for your wellbeing. This level of discernment, Stephanie, that I'm getting to receive from you is gold. And interestingly enough, I just realised, what's your company called?
[00:43:31]
Stephanie: Gold Sheep Design. Anytime anyone says that's gold, I'm like, well, what's the name of my company again? And getting back to people. I think that's part of it too, is getting rid of the people in your life who don't allow you to be who you are. And that's something that I have had to do and it has been difficult. And some of it has come through death. It's like we have people we love, I miss them dearly, but when my mom died, it was just like oh, okay, I can be me now.
[00:44:07]
Stephanie: I don't need to live up to what she wants me to be or getting rid of toxic friendships. Like I had a best friend who we had to not be friends anymore because it was not good for my identity as a person and who I was becoming. She kept me at who I was and was very much not wanting me to become who I am now and who I am still becoming. So, and that's hard. And I think that's probably one of the hardest things. But the more I do it, especially now that the difficult one is gone, like my mom, I'm never gonna have to deal with something that difficult anymore cause there's no one in my life who was as toxic as my mother.
[00:44:50]
Stephanie: After that, I was like, oh, well everyone else, bye. There's no room in my life for people who don't want me to be who I am. And so when people say, I have an annoying voice on YouTube, I'm like, oh, well I didn't make this video for you. Oh, several times. Apparently men don't like my voice.
[00:45:17]
Stephanie: Or at least the kind of men that would say that. I mean, it's better than them saying something about my physical appearance. The first time I put out YouTube videos, I was like, oh my God, they're either gonna hate my voice, because I know people have said in the past that I don't have a great podcasting voice or whatever, and I'm like, it's not that important to me.
[00:45:37]
Stephanie: I'm not gonna get voice lessons or I'm gonna get people commenting about how I look. People are going to judge you no matter what. So just be you because they will judge you. Even when I was living a life that I didn't feel comfortable in and trying to fit in, people still judged me. Yeah, so I might as well just go with who I am and you're still gonna judge me, but at least I'm happy.
[00:46:05]
Melissa: That is like such a massive golden nugget. And to look in the mirror, actually. I know I'm constantly judging people and I don't like everyone, right? I don't like everyone. I give myself permission not to like everyone. So isn't it only fair that I give other people permission to not like me? Seems fair.
[00:46:23]
Stephanie: If everyone loves you, you're doing something wrong. And I think Winston Churchill, I'm gonna butcher Winston Churchill's quote, but he said, uh. Do you have enemies? Good. It means you stood up for yourself or someone or something at some point in your life. Like you took a stand on something.
[00:46:43]
Stephanie: I tell people when I run workshops, they're worried about putting out this work that really, you know, feeds their creative voice and that they're passionate about. What if people don't like it? And I was like, you don't need to worry about whether or not people like you. It's not your job to get people to like you.
[00:46:57]
Stephanie: It's your job to do what you love and the right people will find you. And as much as we hear, like not everybody, I'm not the fit for everybody. Everyone's also not the right fit for me. Like what you said, we all can't help but judge people. It's just human nature. So, might as well give them something to judge about that makes you happy.
[00:47:24]
Melissa: I love that. You know Stephanie, and thank you for bringing into this conversation about. You know, when we talk about fitting in, right, or not fitting in, being creative, living what is true to you, living, owning who you are, and you talked about family, you talked about your mom and, and friends.
[00:47:41]
Melissa: Sometimes we just gotta let people go. That is key. And it's not easy, but it's so important that we do that because that's our boundary. I left home by Asian terms very early at 18, and I did, uh, in, I used air quotes in a way. I kind of disowned my family. I'm like, you know, I'm out of here. I don't need you.
[00:48:00]
Melissa: There was nothing wrong with them, per se, but we're all different people. And basically I didn't feel that I – I'd take full ownership – I was aligned to who they were to their values. Yeah. And even though I have, they bring me up, my parents bring me up. I have their family values, but I have my interpretation of these family values, and it wasn't aligned.
[00:48:22]
Melissa: And so I took the step to move away. It was painful. I moved countries. I was 18, I just dropped out of school. It was frightening. But I had to listen to my heart and my gut, and that level of discernment again, that I'm experiencing with you and through you in this podcast is something that I want everybody listening to remember that that's your power, which is to listen and do what is right by you in your creative journey and your creative life, because it's your life only you can live it. Only you can live it. I mean, what are mistakes at the end of the day, right? I mean, if you don't live your life the way you choose to, you are never gonna learn anything.
[00:49:05]
Melissa: You're just gonna be a version, a really poor version of someone else. Rather than a full version of who you're born to be. So, oh my gosh. It's been incredible talking to you, Stephanie. I'm very mindful of the fact that you stayed up late to chat with me today. I could talk to you for hours. I'm not gonna do that.
[00:49:25]
Stephanie: Maybe I can come back another time.
[00:49:28]
Melissa: Oh yes. Please. I did ask you. If you were a song, what would you be? And you, you told me, you shared with me Butterflies and Hurricanes by Muse. I love Muse
[00:49:38]
Stephanie: They're my favourite band. We can just talk about them for the next hour.
[00:49:44]
Melissa: Well, I'm so happy that I have a song that is the same title as one of their songs. And that's Starlight. Really? Yes. Oh, totally different. But back to the song, why the song? I mean, the title in and of itself, I'm like, mm. Butterflies and Hurricanes. But what is it in this song that you relate to most of all? When I said, if you were a song, what song would you be?
[00:50:09]
Stephanie: Oh, there's so much. If you just think of the title, butterflies and Hurricanes, it's like, you've got this beauty and chaos. And he talks about gotta be the best, your hard times are ahead. And it's just that message of pushing through and persevering through the chaos.
[00:50:27]
Stephanie: But then the music is so epic. And it's a rock anthem, but then there's classical piano. It's that juxtaposition of hard rock and the beauty. It's just a classic. But it's hard and gritty. And I feel like that's me. I've been through hard things. I like to make the most out of my life and push through, and I also like gritty things and dark things, and I like beautiful things.
[00:51:02]
Stephanie: But I think that the main thing is pushing through and regardless of what's going on. But there's so many layers to that song that it's just a beautiful song. Everyone go listen to Butterflies and Hurricanes by Muse. Yeah, they do that. They need more credit.
[00:51:20] Melissa: Stephanie, it's been an absolute pleasure having you on the Fearlessly Curious podcast.Thank you again for being with us. And is there anything you would like to leave our listeners with in particular today?
[00:51:33]
Stephanie: How I sign off on all my emails, on my newsletter – Go boldly and stay gold.
[00:51:39]
Melissa: Go boldly and stay gold, everybody. And finally, how do people get in touch with you? I don't even know if this is something that you want.
[00:51:49]
Stephanie: No, it's, it's fine. Probably our Instagram is probably where I'm most active, even though I don't post very often. I do go on there and I DM and story. So goldsheepdesign is the Instagram, and then goldsheepdesign.com is also our website.
[00:52:05]
Melissa: Wonderful. Thank you Stephanie. Folks, don't forget, stay fearlessly curious until next week. Thank you.
[00:52:16]
Melissa: If you want more, make sure to subscribe so you never miss a new episode every Friday. And please leave a review if you enjoy this episode. Don't forget to send me your curious questions and experiences as inspiration for future episodes. Your anonymity will be respected. If that's what you prefer. For more guidance and support, join my emotional healing, mindfulness and music community over at melissaindot.com. See you next week.
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